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Ten Things To Know
Types of bullies
Physical bullies are action-oriented. This
type of bullying includes hitting or kicking a victim or taking or
damaging a victim's property.
Verbal bullies use words to hurt or
humiliate another person. Verbal bullying includes name-calling,
insulting, making racist comments and constant teasing.
Relational or relationship bullies try to
convince their peers to exclude or reject a certain person or people and
cut those victims off from their social connections. The most devastating
effect with this type of bullying is the rejection by the peer group at a
time when children most need their social connections.
Reactive victims are often the most
difficult to identify because, at first glance, they seem to be targets
for other bullies. However, reactive victims often taunt bullies and
physically bully other people themselves. A reactive victim may provoke a
bully into action, then fight back and claim self defense.
- Bullies come in all ages, sizes, races,
religions, and in both genders.
- People who behave in openly hostile
behavior, who build themselves up by tearing others down, or who
threaten others to make themselves feel powerful are bullies.
- Bullies use many tactics to harass and
threaten people including, but not limited to, words and physical
- The old adage, "Sticks and
stones can break your bones but words will never hurt you!"
is simply not true. Words can be just as harmful as physical
violence and can cause lasting psychological damage to victims.
- Boys most often resort to physical
attacks while girls are more likely to bully with words. For
this reason bullying by girls is often ignored or not taken as
seriously as bullying by boys. The reality is that both types of
bullying are very serious.
- Never try to handle a bully alone.
Always go to a person with authority over the bully such as; a
teacher, a principal, a school staff member or a parent.
- No matter what a bully threatens to do,
you must tell somebody in a position of authority and your parents. Never
suffer in silence. No matter how popular a bully seems
you do not have to handle him/her alone. Responsible adults will help
you if you tell them what is happening. Studies have shown that
bullying stops when adults step in and telling an adult rarely makes
the situation worse.
- Ignoring bullies does not make them
stop. Bullies thrive on the reactions of their victims and ignoring
them can make them step up their efforts. Only adult intervention and
awareness can end the harassment. If you tell an adult and then
start ignoring the bullying behavior the bully will tend to back off.
Only start ignoring the behavior after
you have made as many adults as possible aware of the problem.
- Bullies often model what they see at
home. Sometimes a bully is really crying out for help. Bullies often
act out because they feel they have no control over their own lives;
they bully in an attempt to take control. Telling an adult about a
bully may end up helping BOTH of you.
- As children grow in to teens bullying
behaviors often escalate. Death threats, taunts urging suicide, group
attacks, and violence with weapons can occur. This sort if behavior is
criminal and should always
be reported to the police as well as to school officials and parent.
© COPYRIGHT 2003 John V.
Cooper ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
PO Box 437, Anderson, SC 29622-0437
(864) 225-2885 or (888) 252-8442